Monday, October 08, 2007

The last couple of days have I've been emotionally unstable - tears close to my eyes, and a bit distracted. On Sunday night I put pen to paper (read fingers to keyboard) to write a dedication message about Elijah for the Angelman New Zealand newletter. It took me a good hour or more with tears to write it and this is what I wrote.

Elijah Michael James Humphries -Born 7 February 2004 Called home - 13 August 2008 - treasured son of Darren and Julie and much loved brother of Francesca. As a family we give thanks to God for the life of Elijah, and for the Angelman Syndrome that he journeyed his life with. The house is quieter without Elijah on hands and knees chargin up and down the hall, wrestling with Francesca, smiling and laughing and seldom frowning, Bananas, go off more quickly because they are still here, and not readily consumed, as he was accustomed to do, the nights are quieter too and it took some getting used to sleeping through the night and not waking to be gretted during the night by a smiling often naked little boy displaying his handiwork a shredded nappy or pooh paintings. For all of these things we give thanks. A testimony to his life is the tremedous joy he brought to everyone he met.It is only in his passing we have ralised the lnumber of people Elijah and his short life have touched and will continue to do so. We grieve now but only becuase we loved. We express our thanks to all who have sent us cards and messages. Please continue to journey with us via Elijah's Blog - which Darren continues to write. We continue also our journey in Elijahs' memory, working with families of children with Angleman Syndrome and working to promote an awareness.

I guess it's just the reality that Elijah's no longer physically with us - takes some journeying through. I've been sleeping ok, but phyiscally on edge yesterday - told my boss frist thing in the morning - funny hope people react when you tell them you are emotionally unstable today and could burst into tears at anytime. It took some energy yesterday to focus on what I needed to do at work, one job at a time.

I slept ok last night and will see how the journey goes today - the photo above was taken at the Gethsename gardens here in Christchurch a beautiful private gardens. It was the photo used on the from of the Order of Service for Elijah's funeral. It's funny how some of the nicest photos are the ones you take youself and are also very improptu.
I'm glad that the Lord has something much better in store for me cause the pain of loosing Elijah is intense, and can just creep up on me when I am least expcting it.

1 comment:

Jennifer said...

Darren, that dedication you wrote for Elijah is absolutely beautiful. My heart aches for you as I read through your blog- I can't imagine life without my Angelman son. Your family & Elijah are so lucky to have had each other. I know he is still with you:)
I wish you all the best. I will hold my little guy closer and think about Elijah fondly.
Jennifer- mom to Cameron 7 del+
NB, Canada